The Florida Times-Union, Thursday, September 7, 2006: (I apologize in advance for the salty language. Reading Heloise sends me into a rage that cannot be described. I really may need medication for it someday.)
Dear Heloise: So often when we go to eat Mexican food, we do not eat all the chips they bring with the salsa. I always take them home, crush them and freeze them. They make an excellent topping for casseroles, squash, taco bake, hash browns or any of your favorites.
R. Neuse, Seguin, Texas
Well, Mr. or Mrs. Neuse, my first piece of advice is to stop throwing around phrases like "taco bake" like people will even know what the hell you are talking about. I imagine it could have easily been grouped under the all-encompassing "casseroles". Oh, and by the way, I weep for your dinner guests who are being served casseroles topped with old thawed corn chips that probably were stale before you even crushed them up and snuck them out of the restaurant in your pocketbook.
My other source of concern is, who the fuck doesn't eat all the chips they bring with the salsa at a Mexican restaurant?!? I can't get enough chips at a Mexican restaurant, they have to bring me three or four baskets before the meal is served, and at least two after.
And just when I thought I would never see anything as stupid as a reader writing to Heloise to suggest doing crossword puzzles in pencil, rather than pen....
Dear Heloise: I always have a pitcher of iced tea in my fridge. When I feel like having a cup of hot tea, I just pour a cup of iced tea in a cup and put it in the microwave.
Margaret Caswell, Waterloo, N.Y.
A quick Google search shows that a Margaret Caswell was a teacher at DeWitt High School between 1955-1962. If it is indeed the same Margaret Caswell, I think she may have since turned retarded. I mean, what happens if she uses up all of her iced tea making hot tea, and then wants iced tea all of a sudden? Besides, retarded people shouldn't be playing with microwaves OR hot liquids.
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3 comments:
Dear Hell-o-weez:
Margaret Caswell's idea would also transfer nicely to coffee/iced coffee. And how's about chocolate milk/hot cocoa? Ah, the possibilities microwaves present! might I also suggest drying clothes with it? Or perhaps you're small pet after its bath?
I have one, I have one!
When I use the bathroom to urinate or defecate, I often use thin pieces of tissue to wipe my orifices clean, therefore making the processes far more sanitary. I then discard the used pieces of tissue in the toilet with the fruits of my labor.
To organize the usage of these tissues, I keep them in a roll for easy access and storage!
Ha!!!
I knew I wasn't the only one who was affected in a negative way by Heloise...lol
Thanks for stopping by, I've been out of the loop lately (especially on Blogger) because of service problems with Comcast...it seems that Brentwood is not a high priority when it comes to service issues with them.
RYC...I have no doubt about what you saw on Union and Market. I thought they were changing that place...lol. They've made improvements to Gateway but the same bums are hanging around...I just wish there was more civility amongst them.
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